Eritrean ladies dating second dating
Language “The problem is language; it’s the major issue” 36-year-old Alexi from Congo told me.
“For most of us English is not our first language, we think in our mother tongue then translate it into English.
“Dating is one thing, but marriage is another”, an aunty told me. Marriage and dating are two different things, clearly, but which factors are fundamental when deciding whom to marry? Love is love, as one of the respondents said, but is it better to stay within cultural boundaries to save ourselves from the potential future troubles that might result from mixing cultures – as some elders advice – or should one ignore boundaries and deal with issues if they arise? Having to decide which culture my children followed more or which one was dominant in my household is another consideration, as I find it important for reasons of identity.
African parents, don’t joke with them Young and not-yet-married Nowadays, in this current generation of young-and-not-yet-married, or recently married, we don’t so much as bat an eyelid when we see mixed couples, but as one uncle put it to me, “Where would you live when you retire? If you married a Nigerian, how would you cope if he wanted to retire in Nigeria? Parents’ generation In our parents’ generation we know marrying within their own culture – even tribe – was paramount as they tried to maintain cultural cohesion and identity.
Many question the wisdom of interracial dating, but actually, we seem to have an equally big problem with dating between one African culture and another. Love blinds common sense.”“No Nigerian, Ghanaian or Jamaican man is welcome in my house. Why is it better for me to be with a white man than it is to be with a Nigerian? How many marriages do you know of people from two different African countries that have lasted till old age? I pondered those phrases: “It’s for your own good” and “stick to your own”.
Or rather, we might date outside our own culture but when it comes to marriage we are advised to stick with “our own”. If you’re going to marry a foreigner, marry a white man.”These were the words that fell from my friend’s mother’s mouth when her daughter told her she was dating a Nigerian man because she was tired of Congolese men. ”, said my friend in response, defiantly challenging her mother, to my dismay (anybody knows better than to challenge an African mother! White people “White people don’t have much culture; it’s easy to adapt either way. Was it really for our own good to find our life partners within our own culture?
Luckily, e Harmony's local dating site is here to help you find a more meaningful relationship that lasts.Some responses:“Love is love.” Jennifer (23), Angolan“I would only prefer to date a Congolese man because we both understand each others cultures.The connection is just better because we can relate in many ways since we’ve had a similar upbringing.” Sarah (24), Congolese“I love my Ghanaian brothers, especially those who can speak my tribal language. Especially when telling jokes, it just doesn’t sound the same in English.” Nana (24), Ghanaian“I will be with anyone as long as they are compatible to me and I’m attracted to them. I’m British.” Christopher (28), Nigerian“As long as they are not Jamaican.” Bijoux (28), Congolese“Dating someone from your own background has far more positives than dating someone from another background, such as cultural understanding, speaking the same language etc. I’ve brought a Nigerian, Jamaican and Congolese home.However, even in Congo a country that boasts a long history of tribalism, there came a time during the Mobutu regime when he encouraged tribes and regions to unite because he understood that a united Congo meant a stronger state.Can we apply the same line of reasoning to our argument and suggest that perhaps if we as Africans remain open to marrying people from other African countries, could we also have a stronger and united Africa?
As one uncle put it to me [I’m Congolese], “If you married a Nigerian, how would you cope if he wanted to retire in Nigeria? Could we really say that relationships would be easier if we were with someone of the same origin?